25 Sept 2013

Gf: Meri mummy ko tum .......

Gf: Meri mummy ko tum bahut
pasand aaye ho
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Pappu : Chal Pagli
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Kuchh bhi ho
.
.
main shadi tumse hi karunga...
Aunty se kehna wo mujhe bhool
jayen..  

Boy teasing a girl......

Boy teasing a girl: Ae chalti
kya?
Gal : Kaha?
Boy : Wherever u say...
.
Gal : Ok lets go
shoppng. . . .
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Boy : Kasam se didi aapke
sath to na mazak karna bhi gunah
hai.  

Rape karne walo ko,.......

Rape karne walo ko..
...
....
.....
......
.......
.........
Phasi nahi deni chahiye
.........
........
.......
......
.....
....
...
..
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Unko jinda sher ke pinjare me
daal dena
chaiye.
Janwaro ko janwar hi maare to
accha hoga.
Agree ?    

2 Type ki gals k piche mat bhag0..

2 Type ki gals k piche mat bhag0..
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.
1) jiske piche mai hu..
.
kyuki w0 tum se nahi pategi...
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2) jiske piche me nahi h00n
.
.
.
w0 mujse nahi pati t0 tumse kya Ghanta pategi
.

Truth of student life....

Truth of student life-
.
.
First bench student knows how
to answer every
problem.
.
.
.
.
.
.
But
the last bench student knows
how to face every
problem.. 

Jalebi ko Female............

Jalebi ko Female Kyun kaha Jata Hai?
?
.
.
?
.
?
.
Kyunk Ye Kabhi Seedhi Nahi Ho Sakti
par hoti bhut SWEET hai  

24 Sept 2013

Dear Girls........

Dear Girls..........
..
Jaise 'I love you' bolne se
koi ladki girlfriend nahi ban jaati...
'
'
'
'
.
.
Waise hi 'bhai' bolne se koi ladka
aapka bhai nahi banega...
Hahaha Thoko Like...  

21 Sept 2013

What is love...??

What is love...?? 
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Answer by a boy 
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Love is the 7th sense of Human that destroyed all the six
senses and make the person non-sense... !!

17 Sept 2013

The awsm line of school days.....

The awsm line of school days
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Oye tune bhi homework ni kiya
chal acha hai sath
me bhar niklenge dono
..
Agree students??

13 Sept 2013

3 easy ways 2 die.. !

3 easy ways 2 die.. !

1.Have a cigarette daily
U'll die 10 yrs earlier !!

2.Drink daily
U'll die 30 yrs earlier !!

3.Love some 1 truly
U'll die daily ... !! 

12 Sept 2013

Heart touching story must read :))

Heart touching story must
read :))
.
.
Ek din ek ladke ki girlfriend ka
BIRTHDAY tha,
..
Boy was not in that city,
So he ordered 20 RED ROSE for
his girlfriend.
..
He called her up,
Dear maine tumhare liye utne ROSE bheje hain
jitni saal ki tum
ho gyi ho,
..
While delivering florist thought,
Ye aaj ka mera sabse acha
customer hai,
Chalo ise 10 ROSE FREE me de deta hu,
So he gave 30 instead of20,
.
.
Aur aaj tak ladka nahi
samajh paya ki uska BREAK-UP
kyu hua

लड़का हैंडसम होना चाहिए, ‘स्मार्ट’ तो फोन भी होते हैं।

लड़का हैंडसम होना चाहिए, ‘स्मार्ट’ तो फोन भी होते हैं।

फोन तो आईफोन होना चाहिए, ‘S1, S2...S4’ तो ट्रेन के डिब्बे भी होते हैं।

इंसान का दिल बड़ा होना चाहिए, ‘छोटा’ तो भीम भी है।

व्यक्ति को समझदार होना चाहिए, ‘सेंसटिव’ तो टूथपेस्ट भी है।

टीचर ज्यादा नंबर देने वाला होना चाहिए, ‘अंडा’ तो मुर्गी भी देती है।

युवा राष्ट्रवादी होना चाहिए, ‘कूल’ तो नवरत्न तेल भी है।

राष्ट्रपति कलाम होना चाहिए, ‘मुखर्जी’ तो रानी भी है।

कैप्टन दादा जैसा होना चाहिए, ‘एमएस’ तो ऑफिस भी है।

बाथरूम में हेयर ड्रायर होना चाहिए, ‘टॉवल’ तो श्रीसंत के पास भी है।

लड़की में अक्ल होनी चाहिए, ‘सूरत’ तो गुजरात में भी है।

मोबाइल जनरल मोड पर होना चाहिए, ‘साइलेंट’ तो मनमोहन भी हैं।

सेब मीठा होना चाहिए, ‘लाल’ तो आडवाणी भी हैं।

लड़का द्रविड जैसा होना चाहिए, ‘राहुल’ तो गांधी भी है।

घूमना तो हिल स्टेशन पर चाहिए, ‘गोवा’ तो पान मसाला भी है।

दवाई ठीक करने के लिए होना चाहिए, ‘टेबलेट’ तो सैमसंग का भी है।

रिप्लाई ढंग का होना चाहिए, ‘हम्म’ तो भैंस भी करती है।

11 Sept 2013

Teacher in exam

Teacher in exam :- Udas kyun ho??
Kya pen, pencil, roll no. bhul gye....!!
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Student:- Dimag khrab mat kr yha main galat
subject padhke aa gya, tuje
pen pencil ki padi hai....!!

8 Sept 2013

Facebook ek Mandir hai...........


Facebook ek Mandir hai
.
Page ek Murti hai
Status prasad hai
.
.
Status Update karne wala Pujari hai
.
.
Status padhne wala bhakt hai
.
.
status padhke "LIKE" "comment" na kare ....
Wo mandir k bahar baitha BIKHARI Hai 

7 Sept 2013

3 Idiots - Facebook Style:

3 Idiots - Facebook Style:

Rancho: *Smiling*

Teacher: Aap muskura kyu rahe ho?

Rancho: Bohot dino se Facebook me
account
banane ki ichha thi...aaj bana diya
hai...bohot
maza aa raha hai.

Teacher: Zyada maza lene ki zarurat
nai hai...Tell
me what is a Post?

Rancho: Anything that is posted on
Facebook is
Post, Sir.

Teacher: Can you please elaborate?

Rancho: Sir...jo bhi Facebook pe log
daalte hai
post hai sir...Ghumne gaye...photo
daal diya!
Post hai Sir. Match dekha score daal
diya! Post
hai Sir... Sir actually hum post se
ghire hue hai
sir! Katrina ki pic se Ronaldo ki kick
tak!
Sab post hai sir! Ek second me
comment, ek
second me like!
Comment-Like... Comment-Like

Teacher: Shut up! Account banake ye
karoge?
Comment-Like... Comment-Like...
Hey Chatur tum batao,

Chatur: Pictures, texts or videos
posted through
mobile or tablet or laptop or desktop
via
different operating system using
internet on
Facebook is called a Post...

Teacher: Excellent!

Rancho: Par sir maine bhi toh wahi
bola seedhe
shabdo mein...

Teacher: Seedhe shabdo me karna hai
toh orkut
ya twitter ke pages pe account
banao... :@

Rancho: Par sir dusre sites bhi toh...

Teacher: Get out!

Rancho: Why sir?

Teacher: Seedhe shabdo me bahar
jaiye.

Rancho goes out and comes back*

Teacher: Kya hua?

Rancho: Kuch bhul gaya tha sir.

Teacher: Kya?

Rancho: An utility button given to us,
to protect
our private data i.e pictures,
messages or
personal information for being stolen
or used
for bad purpose by hackers or anyone
else...

Teacher: Kehna kya chahte ho!?!?

Rancho: Logout sir! Logout karna bhul
gaya tha.

Teacher: Seedha seedha nahi bol
sakte the?!

Rancho: Thodi der pehle try kiya tha
sir, aapko pasand nahi aaya...  

True-

True-

Insan pyar karne ke liye hote hai aur..
.
.
Paisa istemal karne ke liye par,
.
.
Dard tab hota hai
.
.
.
.
Jab log paiso se pyar,
aur
Insano ka istemal karte ha.. 

Once Rajni..........

Once Rajni was the guest
contestant in
KBC.
.
.
Amitabh says: Computer ji,
Rajnikant ji se phela sawaal
poochiye. . .
.
.
.
.
.
Computer: main lifeline use
karna chahta
hu..
Lolzzz mind it 

6 Sept 2013

Meri Dharkano me.........

Meri Dharkano me Aap ka Hi Raz Hoga, 
Meri Bat Ka Bas YeHi Andaz Hoga,

Kabhi Bewafaee Nahin Karte Hum PYAR Me,
MeriMohbbat Pe Aap Ko Hamesha Naz Hoga!!! 

Har Kadam Par ...........

Har Kadam Par Usi Ki Yaad Aati Hai,
Ab To Roye Bina Hi Aankh Bhar Aati Hai,
Unke Bina Kya Haalat Ho Gayi,
Ab To Har Ek Pal Mein Apni Maut Nazar Aati Hai !!!

People and Shoes

People and Shoes, both have same virtue.
At first we look for good-looking ones, but in the end we choose the ones we feel comfortable with...

Pagal ne pagal ki jan bachai.

Pagal ne pagal ki jan bachai.

Doctor ne usay office bulaya or kaha:
Tm ne os pagal ko pani k talaab se nikal kr ye sabit kiya k tm normal ho,
Lekin afsos k aj subha us ne rassi se latak kr khudkushi kar li.
.
Pagal: Hahaha
.
.
Wo tou . .
.
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.
.
Mene usy sookhany k liye latkaya tha..  

FIRE ko AAG kehte he .

FIRE ko AAG kehte he
.
.
COBRA ko NAAG kahte he
.
.
GARDEN ko BAAG kahte hai
.
.
Aur "EXAMS" k samay jo kaam na kare
.
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.
.
Use student ka DIMAG kahte Hai!

Us Insaan Se Zyada Badnaseeb Kaun Hoga..

Us Insaan Se Zyada Badnaseeb
Kaun
Hoga..
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Jiski MAGGI Me Masala Ka Pack Hi
Na Nikle...!!!

Teacher- Ladki aur ladke me kya fark hai?

Teacher- Ladki aur ladke me kya
fark hai?
.
.
Chintu- Ladki 1saal me ek hi
bachche ki maa ban sakti hai.
.
.
But
.
.
Ladke 1 saal me 365 bachon ke
papa ban sakte hai......
Teachr shocks
Chintu Rocks 

Heart touching words...

"Don't use ur power of tongue on ur
parents,
from whom u learned how 2
pronounce"..!!!

Whatsapp ek masti hai....

   
Whatsapp ek masti hai

Call se sasti hai

Neend ko udati hai

Khoon ko badati hai

Dimag ko pakati hai

Par kuch bhi ho

ek doosre ki yaad to dilati hai
Ek shayari Whatsapp k liye...

Awsm read this:

Sharifon mein koi chor nahi hota,

khwabon me koi aur nahi hota,

library me koi shor nahi hota,

sawan me aajkal 'mor' nahi hota,

dhandhe me koi 100% pure nahi hota,

Par ek baat ki guarantee hai...

WHATSAPP pe
jo raheta hai woh

life me kabhi bore nahi hote..

Thoko like whtsapp ke liye.... 

 ßranded kaMinA 

Lady teacher to Pappu:

Lady teacher to Pappu:
.
Woh kya hai jo cow k pas 4
aur mere pas 2 hai ??
.
Pappu:"madam legs
.
Mam:"woh kya hai jo tumhare pant
me hai aur mere paticoat me nahi..
.
Pappu:"pocket !!
.
Mam:"woh kya hai jo din me lene k
bajay raat ko bistar par lete hai
.
pappu:"neend
.
Mam:"woh kya hai jo ladki 1st time
karwane par chillati hai
.
pappu:"kaan me chhed
.
Mam:"wo kya hai jiske aadha jane par
dard hota hai par pura jane par accha
lagta hai
.
pappu:"Hatho me kangan
.
MAM:"Wo kya hai jiske paas ho to
haath mein pakad ke hilata hai aur
jiske paas na ho to ungli daal ke
hilata hai
.
Pappu:"tooth brush !!
.
Aap bhi Pappu ki tarah apni niyat
saaf rakkhe... Pappu rocks , teacher shocked \m/

Teacher:" physics ki definition batao

Teacher:" physics ki
definition
batao
.
.
.
.
Papu:" puri nai ati akhiri
se thodi yaad hai
.
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.
Teacher:" sunao
.
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Papu:" and this is called
physics..
..
Teacher shock...PAPU Rocks

Ek pAgal Tha........

Ek pAgal Tha
.
.
..
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.
Wo post parh rha tha
.
.
.
.
Ussy pata tha ki Admin ne usay pagal kaha h...
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Wo phir bhi post parh rha tha...
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Kya krta?
.
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Bechara pagal jo tha.
.
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us ka demagi santulan is qadar kharab tha k wo ye padne ke bad b muskura raha tha...
.
.
Pagal jo tha... 

This will b in future for sure!!

This will b in future for sure!! 

Hey Grand mom how daddy 
looked when he was kid?? 

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Grand Mom: Wait a minute Let Me Login To Facebook...

Ek bar God ek ladke pe khush hokar bola-

Ek bar God ek ladke pe khush hokar bola- "Bol tujhe kya chahiye..?"
.
Boy- "ek sundar si ladki..."
.
God- "bol tu agar muslim hai to tujhe katrina de du.......
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...... Agar hindu hai to tujhe "shraddha kapoor" de du......
.
.
......bol agar tu eesai hai to tujhe "jenelia" de du.....
.
bol beta tera naam kya hai? "
.
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Boy- "mohammad suresh disuza"........
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,
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God- "rakhi savant de sale ko.. Sala over acting kar raha hai......."
    
.

Nursery ke student ne Exam sheet pe SUSU kar Diya..

Nursery ke student ne Exam sheet pe SUSU kar Diya..
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Teacher:" Ye kya kiya hai ??

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.

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Student:" Mummy ne kaha tha ki Pehlejo aa raha ho wahi karna...

Aaj mere aansuon ne mujhse puchha,

Aaj mere aansuon ne mujhse puchha,
.
hume roj-roj kyo bulaate ho.?
.
maine kaha hum yaad to.,
.
kisi apne ko karte hain,
.
tum unki yaado ke saath chale aate ho......,..

Mil gya kamina............

Mil gya kamina
.
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!
!
!
!
"HENRY MISHEL-AMERICAN"
was the fist person who invent
the "EXAMS"
Forward to all students..
..
kaminey ne zindagi ka maza
kharab
kar diya...
1 like = 100 slap

What is Ur Favourite Colour..??

What is Ur Favourite Colour..??

Add Whoever Like Your Comment

1. Red - Sexy
2. Black - Hot
3. White - Simple
4. Blue - Romantic
5. Green - Always Happy
6. Yellow - Attitude
7. Pink - Cute
8. Orange - Sweet
9. Brown - Gorgeous

@ Comment Fast @

American :- "ye Kutub Minar kitne din me bana hai??

American :- "ye Kutub Minar kitne
din me bana hai??
.
.
Indian :- "Ek mahine me,,
.
American :- "yeh hamare Country
me to 2 weeks mein ban jati hai,,
.
.
Thoda aage jane k baad phir
poocha,,
"Yeh Lal kila kitne din mein bana
hai??
.
Indian :- "Sirf 2 weeks mein,,
.
American :- "hamare Country
meinto 3 days mein ban jati hai,,
.
Taj Mahal k paas se guzre toh
american ne pucha,,
"Yeh Taj Mahal kitne din mein bani
hai??
.
.
.
.
.
.
Indian :- "Pata nahi Kal shaam tak
to Nahin tha...
Indian Rocked American shocked

Mobile kya hota h?

Mobile kya hota h?
.
?
.
?
.
?
.
?
?
Jawab talash kar rahe ho kya?
Ye hath me kya samosa Pakde ho
allah Kese kese Namune h, Are yehi mobile hota h.

2 studnts cheating karne hi wale...........

2 studnts cheating karne hi
wale
the ke Teachr agya or pucha:
Tum se peche wale larke ne abi
kya pucha ?
.
.
Studnt: Sir is ne pucha Japan ka
capital kya hai.
.
.
Teachr: Toh tum ne bata dya.?
.
.
Studnt: Nai Sir... Mene isko danta
tha k abi to tu ne muje Toka hai
mgr ab na “TOKYO”
..
Students & Friend-ship Rocks

Atif Aslam ki Love Story..

Atif Aslam ki Love Story..
.
.
Girl:" Who are you..???
Atif:" Mein Ek dard hu ya Ek Ehsas hu..
..
Girl:" Tum Mera Picha kyu karte ho..???
Atif:" Bakhuda tumhi ho, har Jagah tumhi ho..
..
Girl:" Akhir tum Chahte kya ho haan ??
Atif:" kaise Bataye kyun tujhko Chahe yara
Baata na paye..
.
.
Girl:" Tum Mere liye kya kar Sakte ho ??
Atif:" Jhumu Diwana ban ke tere liye..
.
.
Girl Thappad mar ke chali gayi..
Atif:" Ab to Aadat si hai mujhko aise Jeene
mein.. 
..
1 Like to Banta hai

Depression of a single boy- .

Depression of a single boy-
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Koi mujh par emotional atyachar ka loyalty test hi
karwa le,

Kam se kam 5 din k liye koi to milegi.  

A class 5 teacher asked her students .........

A class 5 teacher asked her students to make
rhymes with their names;
Sam:
My name is Sam,
When I grow up to be a man,
I want to go to Russia and Japan,
If I can, If I can, If I can
Candy:
My name is Candy,
When I grow up to be a lady,
I want to have a baby
If I can, if I can, if I can
Dan:
My name is Dan.
When I grow up to be a man,
To hell with Russia and Japan
I m gonna help Candy with her plan
I know I can, I know I can, I know I can.

COMMENT Your Birth Month

January - Hot
February - Sexy
March - Cute
April - Dope
May - Drop dead gorgeous
June - Lover
July - Player
August - Cheater
September - Faithful
October - Caring
November - Adorable
December - Rock ur world

COMMENT Your Birth Month, Whoever likes it would date you  Add them  

Which CHOCOLATE is your Favourite ?

Which CHOCOLATE is your Favourite ?

1. ) Dairy Milk
2. ) Kit-Kat
3. ) Perk
4. ) Five Star
5. ) Melody
6. ) Cadbury
7. ) Nestle
8. ) Munch
9. ) Amul
10. ) Any other ( Mention name )
11. ) All
12. ) None

Comment Fast..!!

Bezzati: Beech Bazar . .

Bezzati: Beech Bazar
.
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.
Boyfriend:- yr ye petrol fr
se mehnga ho
gya...!!
..
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Girlfriend:- Chahe jitna bhi
mehnga ho
jaye tu dalwaega 20 ka hi...!! 

5 Sept 2013

Time ho to jarur padhna.. .

Time ho to jarur padhna..
.
ye story yahi jindagi ki
haqikat hai]
.
.
.
Ek bache ne nayi car par patthar
se skrach dal
diya,
.
jab pita ne dekha to usne gusse
me hathodi
bache k hath pe mar di aur uski
unglia chali
gai..
.
.
pita apne gusse pe dukhi ho
kar bache k hath
ko dekh k rone lga.
.
.
achanak uski najar car par pade
skrach par
gai.
.
usne gorse dekha car par
skrach karke bache
ne likha tha.
.
.
"I LOVE MY PAPA"
.
.
dosto risto ki kimat ka andaja
risto ko khone
ke baad hota hai!!!!!!!
.
.
so take care of your
relations... ♥♥♥

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